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Main| Yes No Maybe So: Martin Scorsese's "The Irishman"and NYFF Trivia »
Thursday
Aug 01 2019

Streaming Roulette,August: Serenity,Red Sea Diving Resort,and two major 1981 classics

As is our practice we've selected a handful of titles and frozen the films at utterly random moments without cheating (whatever comes up comes up!).It's our way of previewing new titles streaming each month.So what should you queue up forAUGUST2019?(★ means we recommend catching them.) Please do let us know if you're dying to discuss any of the films and maybe we'll write about one or two of 'em  You rarely tell us but we'll try if you do.

[COUGHING]

Jackie Brown(1997) ★  on Netflix
Is De Niro coughing to distract you fromOnce Upon a Time ...in Hollywoodfor a minute?He's gota new trailer outand that would like a little attention,too.On the couch is Bridget Fonda giving what is easily one of her top two performances (the other one is in a little seen 80s movie calledScandal). We should probably see this particular Quentin Tarantino flick again.Beyond Fonda's perpetually baked surfer girl I don't personally remember much about it except for thatRashomoninspired scene in the mall,and Pam Grier and Robert Forster being a fine match in the two central roles.

[HEAVY BREATHING]

Body Heat(1981) ★  on HBO
Nice wedding ring shot.That ain't her husband...

We're about to pan up on Kathleen Turner orgasming while William Hurt takes her from behind.What's more it's not even remotely the hottest sex scene in the movie.Maybe third or fourth?Seconds after climax Hurt complains that his dick is "red and sore...look at it,it's about to fall off".This movie is so dirty.Andsoexcellent.It's one of those rare loose remakes of an indisputable classic (Double Indemnity) that is also a total classic.

It remains one of the most embarrassing Oscar blunders of all time that Turner wasn't nominated for her astonishing film debut.Very few film stars have ever arrived with this much force.You could even argue that she should've won for it.Sorry Katharine Hepburn's fourth Oscar,Meryl Streep's "french lieutenants...whore!",Marsha Mason's alcoholic actress,and Susan Sarandon's lemon-scented waitress!The only Best Actress nominee that year that's an actual threat to Turner's mesmerizingly amoral seductress is Diane Keaton's commie journalist inReds.

-What do people speak in Malta?
-Maltanese?

The Red Sea Diving Resort(2019) on Netflix
A fake hotel serves as a cover for undercover agents to help smuggle refugees to safety.We're just hearing about this for the first time today and solely via the context of its man-candy...

I wish we could just go away and live on a desert island together,but we can't."

Pennyworth(2019) season 1 on Amazon Prime
Oh dear.And,yes that's actual dialogue.Yet another Batman universe prequel spin-off.Batman is like a cancer.He keeps spreading.All I ask is for like a ten year time-out.I don't think it's too much to ask.Other characters get breaks from time to time.Also Alfred Pennyworth looks like he's about 20 years old.Even when they give an iconic elderly character a series,they make it a prequel so they can cast for the youth audience.

[EXPLOSION NOISES RECEDING]

Das Boot(1981) ★  on Hulu
This German submarine classic made $11 million in its US release in 1982.$11 million !!!That makes it the size of a hit of something likeThe Favourite(2018) today which grossed $34 in the US.It was clearly not far from a Best Picture nomination in 1982 since it received six Oscar nominations including Director and Screenplay.We're unsure why Germany didn't submit it to represent them at the Oscars as clearly it would have won Best Foreign Film in either 1981 or 1982,亚博主页whichever year it would have been eligible to represent them;Germany missed both shortlists in those years -- submitting Fassbinder'sLili Marleeenand Herzog'sFitzcarraldoin those years --  and the Oscars went to Hungary's亚博主页Mephisto(1981) and Spain'sTo Begin Again(1982) respectively.Anyone know the story?

Doesn't anyone around here do any work that they're paid to do?

Serenity(2019) ★  on Amazon Prime
We've tried to tell you several times thatthis is an absolute must-see.You will not believe your eyes from the dialogue to the camerawork through the plotting and around the archetype heavy "characters"and McConaughey Exhibitionism.The scene screencapped above is absolutely nuts despite the lack of McConaughey's nuts.He's about to "take a shower"(which doesn't mean what you think it means) after discussing tuna (no,really) with the lonely perpetually horny Diane Lane whose pussycat keeps running away (no,really).

[INAPPROPRIATELY LOUD LAUGHTER]

Four Weddings and a Funeral(1994) ★  on Netflix
Cheeky of Netflix to add this on the same day that Hulu premieres their new series loosely based on this property.Oh,and since Andie MacDowell and Simon Callow are the two actors pictured clearly here,let's discuss.Remember how ubiquitous and delightful Simon Callow was in 80s and 90s films?He'll always be The Reverent Mr Beebe inA Room with a Viewto us.We haven't seen much of him lately but he was inVictoria & Abdul(2017) and had a recurring role onOutlandera few years back.As for Andie MacDowell,she's never stopped working but the big MacDowell related news recently is that her daughter is currently in the midst of a formidable breakout year.I had to post this to Twitter...

ALSO STREAMING RIGHT NOW...

  • Are We Done Yet?
  • Boyka: Undisputed
  • Groundhog Day
  • Kengan Ashura Part 1
  • Horns
  • Jupiter Ascending
  • The Letdown SEASON 2
  • Now and Then
  • Panic Room ★
  • Rocky ★
  • Rocky II
  • Rocky III
  • Rocky IV
  • Rocky V
  • Sex and the City: The Movie
  • Something's Gotta Give
  • The Bank Job
  • The House Bunny
  • The Sinner: Julian
  • Wentworth SEASON 7
  • Whitney Cummings: Can I Touch It?(Netflix Original)
  • Why Do Fools Fall in Love

August 2nd

  • Ask the Storybots SEASON 3
  • Basketball or Nothing (Netflix Original)
  • Dear White People VOLUME 3
  • Derry Girls SEASON 2 ★
  • Otherhood
  • She-Ra and the Princesses of Power SEASON 3

August 4th

  • Patriot Act with Hasan Minhaj VOLUME 4

August 5th

  • Enter the Anime (Netflix Original)
  • No Good Nick PART 2

August 6th

  • Screwball
  • Sebastian Maniscalco: Why Would You Do That

August 8th

  • Dollar (Netflix Original)
  • Jane the Virgin SEASON 5
  • Judy Moody and the Not Bummer Summer
  • The Naked Director (Netflix Original)
  • Wu Assassins SEASON 1

August 9th

  • Cable Girls SEASON 4
  • The Family (Netflix Original)
  • GLOW SEASON 3 ★
  • The InBESTigators
  • iZombie SEASON 5
  • Rocko's Modern Life: Static Cling
  • Sintonia
  • Spirit Riding Free: Pony Tales

August 13th

  • Knightfall SEASON 2
  • Tiffany Haddish Presents: They Ready (Netflix Original)

August 14th

  • The 100 SEASON 6

August 15th

  • Cannon Busters

August 16th

  • 45 rpm (Netflix Original)
  • Apache: La vida de Carlos Tevez (Netflix Original)
  • Better Than Us (Netflix Original)
  • Diagnosis (Netflix Original)
  • Frontera verde (Netflix Original)
  • Invader Zim: Enter the Florpus
  • The Little Switzerland
  • Mindhunter SEASON 2
  • QB1: Beyond the Lights SEASON 3
  • Selfless
  • Sextuplets
  • Super Monsters Back to School
  • Victim Number 8 (Netflix Original)

August 17th

  • The Punisher

August 20th

  • Gangs of New York
  • Simon Amstell: Set Free (Netflix Original)

August 21st

  • American Factory (Netflix Original)
  • Hyperdrive (Netflix Original)

August 22nd

  • Love Alarm (Netflix Original)

August 23rd

  • El Pepe Una Vida Suprema (Netflix Original)
  • Hero Msk: Part II
  • Rust Valley Restorers (Netflix Original)

August 27th

  • Million Pound Menu SEASON 2 (Netflix Original)
  • Trolls: The Beat Goes On!SEASON

August 29th

  • Falling Inn Love
  • Kardec
  • Workin' Moms SEASON 3

August 30th

  • The A List (Netflix Original)
  • Carole & Tuesday
  • The Dark Crystal: Age of Resistance (Netflix Original)
  • Droppin Cash SEASON 2
  • La Grande Classe
  • Mighty Little Bheem SEASON 2
  • Styling Hollywood (Netflix Original)
  • True and the Rainbow Kingdom: Wild Wild Yetis
  • Un Bandido Honrado (Netflix Original)

August 31st

  • Luo Bao Bei SEASON 1

  • After Darkness
  • Along with the Gods: The Last 49 Days
  • Bachelor in Paradise SEASON 6 PREMIERE
  • Dior and I
  • HeartlandSEASON 11
  • PureSEASON 2
  • UnikittySEASON 1B
  • A Viking Saga: The Darkest Day
  • Alien vs.Predator
  • American Heart
  • Baby Boom ★
  • Big Fish
  • The Brady Bunch Movie ★
  • A Very Brady Sequel ★
  • Bulletproof Monk
  • Cats & Dogs
  • Chinese Box
  • The Color Purple ★
  • Confessions of a Dangerous Mind
  • The Crocodile Hunter: Collision Course
  • The Cutting Edge
  • The Cutting Edge: Going for the Gold
  • Dances with Wolves
  • Double Impact
  • Down in the Delta
  • Drumline
  • Eight Men Out
  • The Fifth Element ★
  • Final Destination
  • Final Destination 2
  • Final Destination 3
  • The Final Destination
  • Four Weddings and a Funeral SERIES PREMIERE
  • Furry Vengeance
  • Good Advice
  • Hackers
  • The Hunchback of Notre Dame (1923)
  • Idiocracy
  • Indecent Proposal
  • Ingenious
  • Jeepers Creepers 2
  • John Grisham's The Rainmaker
  • Kama Sutra
  • Man on a Ledge
  • Marley and Me: The Puppy Years
  • Meet the Parents
  • Mr.Magorium's Wonder Emporium
  • My Bloody Valentine
  • The Pink Panther
  • The Pink Panther 2
  • Rat Race
  • Repentance
  • Robin Hood: Men in Tights
  • Rosemary's Baby ★
  • Rushmore
  • Seven ★
  • Shivers
  • Snake Eyes
  • Spider-Man 3
  • Star Trek: The Motion Picture
  • Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan ★
  • Star Trek III: The Search for Spock
  • Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home
  • Star Trek V: The Final Frontier
  • Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country
  • Star Trek VIII: First Contact
  • Star Trek IX: Insurrection
  • Star Trek: Nemesis
  • Stargate
  • Step Up
  • The Terminator ★
  • The Transporter
  • Throw Momma from the Train
  • Tracker
  • Urban Cowboy
  • White Men Can't Jump
  • Zookeeper

August 2nd

  • Rick Steves Cruising the Mediterranean
  • Anger Management
  • Non-Fiction

August 5th

  • The Kleptocrats

August 6th

  • Apollo Mission to the Moon
  • Attack on Titan SEASON 3A
  • Bachelor in Paradise SEASON 6
  • Plus One
  • The Swan Princess: Kingdom of Music

August 7th

  • The Armstrong Tapes

August 8th

  • Apollo: Back to the Moon
  • BH90210 SERIES PREMIERE
  • Mortdecai

August 9th

  • The Beach Bum

August 13th

  • Sharkfest
  • Andy Irons: Kissed by Gods

August 15th

  • The Actors
  • Dogman
  • Own the Sky
  • Rattlesnakes
  • Smoke Signals
  • Zoo-Head

August 20th

  • The Layover

August 21st

  • This Way Up SEASON 1

August 22nd

  • A Simple Favor ★
  • Hail,Satan?★

August 23rd

  • Jawline (Hulu Original)
  • Mission: Impossible - Fallout ★
  • Operation Finale

August 24th

  • Mapplethorpe

August 25th

  • Wicked Tuna SEASON 5

August 26th

  • Captain Fantastic ★

August 27th

  • Mom SEASON 6
  • The Lincoln Lawyer

August 28th

  • How to Train Your Dragon: The Hidden World

August 29th

  • The Son SEASON 2
  • Body at Brighton Rock

August 30th

  • Four of a Kind SEASON 1
  • Gameface SEASON 2
  • Gintama SEASON 1
  • S.W.A.T SEASON 2


We've found from months of doing this that the Amazon Prime listings provided are the least accurate in terms of what's actually available for free with a membership so take some of the titles with a grain of salt.

  • After Darkness
  • Arctic
  • American Heart
  • Chinese Box
  • Corpse Bride ★
  • Cutting Edge: Going for the Gold
  • Dumb and Dumber
  • Dumb and Dumberer
  • Eight Men Out
  • Furry Vengeance
  • Good Advice
  • Hackers
  • The Haunting of Sharon Tate
  • Ingenious
  • Jeepers Creepers 2
  • Kama Sutra
  • My Bloody Valentine
  • Pennyworth SEASON 1
  • The Rainmaker
  • Rat Race
  • Rosemary's Baby ★
  • S.W.A.T
  • Star Trek IV: Voyage Home
  • Star Trek VI: Undiscovered Country
  • Star Trek: First Contact
  • Star Trek: Insurrection
  • Star Trek: Nemesis
  • Tracker
  • Twelve Monkeys ★
  • Urban Cowboy
  • A Very Brady Sequel ★
  • A Viking Saga: The Darkest Day
  • A Vigilante

August 2nd

  • 300
  • This is Football SEASON 1

August 7th

  • All I See is You

August 9th

  • Free Meeks SEASON 1
  • Pete the Cat: SEASON 1,PT 2

August 12th

  • Andy Irons: Kissed by God

August 16th

  • Photograph
  • Jim Gaffigan: Quality Time SEASON 1

August 21st

  • A Simple Favor

August 23rd

  • #IMomSoHardLive SEASON 1
  • Mike E Winfield Stepman SEASON 1
  • Mission: Impossible - Fallout
  • Alice Wetterlund: My Mama is a Human and So Am I SEASON 2
  • Alonzo Bodden: Heavy Lightweight SEASON 1

August 26th

  • The Lincoln Lawyer

August 30th

  • Carnival Row SEASON 1

  • Arizona
  • Brothers
  • Chariots of Fire
  • Conviction
  • Dangerous Liaisons ★
  • Deliver us From Eva
  • The Dilemma
  • Dreamer: Inspired by a True Story
  • Fly Me to the Moon
  • Getaway
  • Going the Distance
  • A Lego Brickumentary
  • The Lost Boys ★
  • Just Like Heaven
  • Out of Africa
  • Rio
  • Search Party
  • Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow

August 2nd

  • A Black Lady Sketch Show SERIES PREMIERE
  • Boy Erased ★

August 3rd

  • The Favourite ★

August 9th

  • Pico de Neblina SERIES PREMIERE

August 10th

  • Aquaman
  • My Favourite Shapes by Julio Torres

August 11th

  • Succession SEASON 2 PREMIERE

August 14th

  • Alternate Endings: Six New Ways to Die in America

August 18th

  • The Righteous Gemstones SERIES PREMIERE

August 24th

  • Mortal Engines

August 27th

  • The Mule

August 31st

  • Can You Ever Forgive Me?★

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Reader Comments (12)

"Batman is like a cancer.He keeps spreading.All I ask is for like a ten year time-out.I don't think it's too much to ask.Other characters get breaks from time to time."

OMG Nathaniel,so true.IS THERE ANYTHING HONESTLY COMPELLING ABOUT BATMAN AS A CHARACTER?ANY REAL LAYERS OR DEPTH OR ANY "THERE"THERE WHATSOEVER?

No,there isn't.Sorry to shout.

August 1,2019 | Unregistered CommenterRob

Nat don't you think Fonda's best performance came from A Simple Plan a year later,don't you wish she'd appear in something again,why couldn't she have Laura Dern's role in Marriage Story.

August 1,2019 | Unregistered Commentermarkgordonuk

RE I prefer Lange that year in The Postman Always Ring Twice as a nominee over Streep with Spacek,Keaton,Mason and Turner as the other 4.

August 1,2019 | Unregistered Commentermarkgordonuk

Top two performances from Bridget Fonda: Jackie Brown and A Simple Plan.She was on a roll,sad she didn't find better material later.I also love her in Singles,so cute.

August 1,2019 | Unregistered Commenterremy

Keep an eye out for Qualley for the 2020 Best Actress race she's teaming with Sigourney for My Salenger Year.

August 1,2019 | Unregistered Commentermarkgordonuk

and there's that other mcdowell kid who was in mad men for just an episode,the one in which don discovers rachel died

August 1,2019 | Unregistered Commentercal roth

I love Fitzcarraldo.It's brilliant.It says such potent things about hubris,(mis) communication,control,dreams,privilege,and mania.And the fact that the making of the movie almost mirrored those messages is perfect on such a meta level.It should have been nominated for the foreign language Oscar.I'm not saying any of this to knock Das Boot,you must understand.I just wanted to advocate a little for the choice of Fitzcarraldo.

August 1,2019 | Unregistered CommenterCash

ABSOLUTELY DO NOT READ SPOILERS BEFORE SEEING Serenity.TRUST!!!!!!

August 1,2019 | Unregistered Commenterforever1267

Bridget Fonda is tops in A Simple Plan.Wish she coulda been nominated

August 1,2019 | Unregistered Commentermj

omigosh I still need to see Serenity!

August 1,2019 | Unregistered CommenterRob

Mark -- i guess she's happy in retirement since she's never done anything after deciding to give it all up for motherhood (she's married to Danny Elfman and I guess he makes enough money with perpetual film scoring)

August 1,2019 | Registered CommenterNATHANIEL R

Also agree with others about Fonda in "A Simple Plan".Terrific thriller (the book is also a quick page turner,with a very different ending) and she is equally as good as the nominated Thornton.

Paxton,on the other hand,well,he was darn good looking,that's for sure.Rest in Peace.

August 1,2019 | Unregistered Commenterforever1267

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